ALL is everything portable you can see in this room. Solid clod-hopping hoots of tough leather. A sparkling crystal of what looks like quartz, shedding a faint yellow glow. Bearing the Baron's red seal, this parchment is your passport to other worlds. The legendary Lance of Luxmendly, tassled, its point of razor-sharp steel. Embossed 'Punster Mine Co.' Men would sell their shins for such wealth. Thar she blows! Black, of coarse cloth with a hood of golden silk; the robe of a Martial Monk.A halo of solid silver, engraved with heroic scenes from the life of Luxmendly.Useful if you expect to underground. A rowing-boat, heavy oaken oars ready in the rowlocks. Good ole teddy seems quite relaxed, in spite of it all. A beam of solid pine. Useful for crossing pools with? Bewildered, for it belongs to some other world. 3:1 gin:vermouth. Ice-cold. A beam of solid pine. Useful for crossing pools with? A faint tartan pattern may betray a northern origin for these pantaloons. Fisherman's knit, good against draughts. A robust tweedy dog-lovers' skirt. Highly recommended for bondage fans. An insert reads, 'To kill ASMODEUS: jotj+efij+ntbz+ijto+bnf<'. 40% meat, 20% sawdust, 10% artificial flavourings, 30% magic. Blech. Still, edible in a emergency. Poo. Recommended for getting water from streams and such. A simple knife, of wood and steel; sharp as a...all right, not very sharp. A sabre with a history, its iron blade rusted with blood. A piratical tool is the steel cutlass, whose victims are left often gutless. Cudgel? Prehistoric, solid oak with brass knobs. Nasty. A handy length of rope, slightly frayed. What a surprise, a key. Wonder where the lock is? A label reads, 'Abbey Library cddg++ankd++tcta'. A hessian sack, useful for putting things in. An antique flute, battered but playable. Japanese, perhaps; an elegant vessel bearing scenes of rude fore-fathers. Colonial Spanish, embossed with a monkey clamping his hands over his ears. A brass guinea, bearing a picture of some sort of robe. A tiny lead groat, embossed with the picture of a boat. Embossed with the figure of a monkey, one hand covering his mouth. From the mysterious Orient, embossed with a monkey, hands covering his eyes. Boing boing boing. Slither slither slither. Pale and sharp, a vicious weapon culled from the jaw of a Great Boar. Crusty, and studded with delicious raisins. ...you're making me hungry. Delicious. Yum yum. A dusty spell-book. Inside you read, 'Spider-poison, must ask the Inquisitor.'Poo. On its shell you read, 'Drop there what there belongs, careful that they live.'Useful against spiders - if you can persuade the spider to take it. Used by ancient Inquisitors to inject poison, a ghastly tool, a foot long. There haven't been chickens round here in 100 years. A snake's egg? Labelled 'Magic Matchboxes - Never be without a light.' It glows curiously. Your face, and my... A tiny green violin-playing Buddha, with a waxen and well-rubbed surface. Engraved 'Pumcoddle's po-pot, rub for hints!' Aromatic hops, ready for Mashing. Malt, superior quality, ready for the Malting Vat. 'MINE - please return to Ari's kebab-house' is engraved upon this skewer. Chunks of cold lamb on a skewer labelled 'MINE'. The dartboard's bull is picked out in red. A label: 'MINE'. This ragged doll, porcelain-faced, has a gem in one eye. A label: 'MINE'. Yes I can, sir. How odd, it bears a label, 'MINE'. Two labels on this smelly item - 'Leo Ltd., for hermits to lie on', and 'MINE'.The steel axe-head - marked 'MINE' - is fixed to a handle inscribed 'MADE IN ?'A sticky mass of wet fish-scales, in a wrapper labelled 'MINE'. The diadem - engraved 'MINE' - is wrought into the shape of a scorpion. The clock - labelled 'MINE' - has lost its Tick. Suitable for a Toxophilite? A tin of sweetcorn, labelled 'MINE - produtto di Capri'. Labelled 'Planet Beer, property of MINE'. Who has Seized the rest of this tasty pie, 'MINE' cooked into its crust? A dagger of purest silver, the death's-head Behemoth emblem on its hilt. Worn though it is, the head of this hammer could still make a useful dent. A spike of iron like a large tack, nastily pointed. No lid; it seems there is no way into this solid box. A simple copper coin, bearing on one side a picture of a coffin. Curiously-wrought, this heavy shield of unknown metal bears a large red cross. Poo! It reads, '...ider-poison, flower-derived, in the Inquisitor's cabinet...' An iron mace, inset diamonds giving it a cruel edge. A Spanish guitar, nicely out of tune. The mouth-piece bears the tooth-marks of previous owners. Old, but playable. A purple drooping flower, edible, or poisonous? No spiders in the Graveyard. A heavy pewter pot, engraved 'All I want is food'. Green peas, spilling from their pods. The King of Salmon, fresh from the River Wend. Crisp carrots. Fortunately there are no rabbits in Eastway. A monster, last of Pumcoddle's genetic experiments, ruby-red. Oddly purple, with an aroma of old socks. This is how the Monks like it. This rattling lantern sheds a light without flame. Useful underground. The steel helmet of Dragdooly, renegade priest, who died heroically at last. The skull of Dragdooly, somewhat wan. Could do with cheering up. The sacred dart of Dragdooly, renegade priest and slayer of demons. A mallet with hammer-head and handle of oak, but splintered, easily broken. The mallet handle, polished oak, could be useful in other circumstances. An immense pinewood keg, its walls thin and groaning with the beer's pressure. The hoop of iron that once girt a beer-keg that has exploded. A pine-wood plank from an exploded beer-keg. Useful for crossing pools with? Doplipterum luminosum, a phosphorescent bug; smelly as a wrestler's jockstrap. Water, plain, cool water, fresh as rain-water. The hoop that once girt a beer-keg that has exploded. The only remaining pine-wood plank from an exploded beer-keg. Doplipterum luminosum, a phosphorescent bug smelly as a wrestler's jockstrap. Water, plain, cool water, fresh as rain-water. who rolls around on his seat as if buffeted by a gale. A rather sly individual foxy. His long beard - silver threads among the gold - dangles over his midriff. Heseems quite pleased with his recent deals. Forearms like tree-trunks bearing a curious tattoo; a dangerous individual. The good and much-misunderstood Baron will probably describe himself to you, ifyou give him the slightest opportunity. A surly chap with a thick black beard. Clad in a parody of a monk's habit, this cursed demon gibbers and slavers, pusdripping from bloodshot eyes. A bearded loony with specs, he fumbles around examining everything. Clad in a ragged suit of motley hue, the fool maybe no fool at all. Her white silken gown is spotted with the tears she has shed for her husband. A robust, jolly chap with red cheeks. A little black imp, cute as a button but with eyes of fire. Rather smelly, with a beard down to his knees. Clad in a winding-sheet, the ghoul examines you with distaste. The callouses on his hands reveal a life spent pulling on oars and stitchingnets. A breezy, bustling little chap, looking for some house to repair. His armour rattling, the knight utters a series of immense burps. Nasty. My, the dog looks hungry. Whiskers a foot long. Nasty. Ugh! A nasty smelly horrid bristling beast. scuttle scuttle gnaw gnaw (scratch)
